Pack a bag of things you would want to take with you, but keep it hidden so that your abuser won't find it.  Some things you might want to keep in the bag:

• Copies of health records - school records, vaccination records, any doctor's documentation of specific health problems which may need attention.

• Copies of birth certificates for you and your children.

• Copies of marriage certificates, separation papers, divorce papers, temporary restraining orders, paternity documents, custody orders, or any other legal papers.

• Copies of work permit, immigration papers, or any other documents which you would need to prove the right to work in this country.

• Spare keys for your home, office, car, post office box, safe deposit box.

• Extra medication, prescriptions, phone number for your doctor or pharmacy to call for refills.

• A list of key addresses and phone numbers, in case you can't take your address book.

• A few toys or books that would entertain your children for a short time.

• A pre-paid phone card, which would allow you to make long-distance calls from a pay phone, if necessary.

There are other things you will want to take with you if you can, but having copies could be impractical - your safety is the most important thing, so if you have to leave without these items, don't worry about them:

• Driver's license, passport, green card, work permit, immigration papers, social security card, welfare identification, etc.

• Family heirloom pictures, almanac, jewelry, bible, baby books.

• Money and money sources such as your checkbook, ATM card or credit cards.  Remember that using ATM cards and credit cards can be traced to a particular location, so beware that your abuser could use these to track you down.

• Any supplies your children might need, such as diapers or bottles.

• Children's security blanket, special toys they may want or need to sleep with.

Other things you can do to help yourself be as safe as possible:

• Think of at least one person you trust and let them know about your situation, ask them to contact police if violence is heard or suspected. Ask them if you can stay with them if necessary. If possible, also leave a bag with money, extra keys and clothes with that person.

• Teach your children how to dial 911 and get help.

• Plan a code word for your family and friends to alert them to your need for help in case of an emergency, this word must be something you could say to them in front of your abuser without alerting your abuser to what you are doing.

• When an argument starts, move to a safe room such as one with a door or window to the outside. Do not allow yourself to be isolated in a room with no escape.

• Keep calm, so you can better protect yourself and your children.

• Open a savings account and put every cent you can hide away into it.

• Memorize phone numbers for the domestic violence hotline and women's shelters in you area.

• Try to carry money with you at all times in case you have to leave without warning. DO NOT use checks or credit cards once you leave as your abuser can use them to track you down.